See the commercial here.
Synopsis: In a suburban breakfast nook fraught with more simmering tension than the Gaza Strip, a pathetic, spineless excuse for a man, "Steve," infuriates his bitter, shrew-like wife by innocently asking if she's slurping up soggy MultiGrain Cheerios in a token and undoubtedly futile effort to shed some of the many pounds she's put on since their unfortunate wedding day, notwithstanding her implausible cover story that she's eating the colorfully-packaged animal feed for "other reasons," which she declines to specify.
Steve steps in it, big-time
"Sounds like someone's ready for another ass-kicking."
Five whole grains stand between Steve and intensive care
Message: A joyless marriage never tasted so good.
Who couldn't love this face?
The secret ingredient is rage
Subliminal Message: The only way to avoid the wrath of your fat, irritable wife is to suppress your pent-up unhappiness and dissatisfaction behind a chippy veneer of emasculated wussiness.
"What did you say to me, you little prick?"
A third less fat than sawdust, but all of the flavor
Memorable Moment: After Mr. Whipped hastily tries to obfuscate his rare display of candor by pointing out that it's "the box" -- not he -- which says that MultiGrain Cheerios is only 110 calories per serving, the bloated, beastly woman he foolishly chose to wed icily snaps, "What else does the box say?" Pausing ever so briefly to ponder the decades of servile supplication that lie ahead, her beloved replies, "It says, 'Shut up Steve.'" Fatty's cold, passionless lips curl up into a triumphant smile.
And so ends ten thousand years of male domination
That's it ... dance for me, monkey ...
You know what else has only 110 calories? Steve's balls.
Disturbing Aspect: Steve, having been beaten senseless by his irate wife the previous week for questioning her decision to eat a tangerine, has been telling concerned friends that the visible cuts and bruises on his body were caused by a bad "fall."
If only General Mills could hear him cry at night ...
Burning Questions: What color is the dress that Steve's wearing just below the camera frame? Outside of professional kabuki theater, has any heterosexual man been able to arch his eyebrows more dramatically than Steve? How many more marriages will MultiGrain Cheerios have to destroy before they take it off the market?
Overall Loathsomeness: 9.8
Mitigating Factor: This commercial originally aired in Great Britain, which pretty much explains everything.