Plavix "Golf Gurney"

See the commercial here.

Synopsis: A menopausal former heart attack victim joylessly plays a round of golf while being ominously stalked by a sentient, self-propelled hospital gurney sent by the Angel of Death to try to drag her back to grave.


Mind if I play through? Heh-heh ...

Message: Plavix knows what your arteries did last summer.


This is what happens when you swallow too many baby teeth

Subliminal Message: God doesn't love you enough to save your ass twice.

Memorable Moment: While Betty Blood Clot approaches her 6-foot putt, the gurney searches for its ball in the rough.


Anyone find a Titleist?

Disturbing Aspect: Respecting no bounds of common decency, the gurney rolls stealthily into the women's locker room to spy on Betty while she changes her shoes.


Oh, yeah ... yeah, that's it ... come on, baby ...

Burning Questions: Why is the gurney, which effortlessly managed to pursue its target around an 18-hole golf course, in and out of the clubhouse, and all the way across town to the cardiologist's office, unable to negotiate a simple automatic door? Did Doctor Dramatization ever consider changing his name in order to attract more patients? If Obama's health care bill passes, will taxpayers have to pick up the tab for Betty's greens fees?


Um ... a little help?


Last non-Indian physician in America struggles to read Hindi

Overall Loathsomeness: 5.8

Mitigating Factor: Betty's country club subsequently banned all rogue medical equipment from teeing off before 11:00 AM, except during league play.