Synopsis: In a reasoned, fact-based policy argument against implementation of the Affordable Care Act, a new conservative advocacy group bankrolled by rich old men tries to persuade middle-to-low income young women to forego health insurance by depicting a historic personification of the United States as a creepy gynecologist who takes delight in probing their freedom-loving genitals.
The federal government wishes it could devote more resources to preventing crazed homicidal gunmen from wreaking havoc on U.S. military bases, but it has its hands full secretly monitoring routine health care transactions between law-abiding citizens
It’s a tedious job, but once in a while, you hit the jackpot
Oh yeah, this one’s going on the “Watch List.“ Heh-heh …
Kelly went with rolled-up denim shorts, a thin cotton shirt, and no bra for her first gynecological exam
Socialized medicine has never looked so … hot.
“Are there any cute doctors here? Because I just turned 18 … “
Skinny got no clue what she’s in for.
“I see you chose to sign up for Obamacare, even though that’s a totally nonsensical statement, because Obamacare is a law, not a health plan, and you don’t ‘sign up’ for it.”
“Since you’re young and magically immune from major illness or injury, you really don’t need any insurance coverage at all, and you’d be better off just paying a small penalty so you can continue to enjoy your guaranteed good health and avoidance of misfortune without having to fill out lots of annoying paperwork.”
“Huh – I never thought about it that way … “
Before proceeding further, Dr. Lopez must confirm that Medicaid recipients don’t need any of Kelly’s organs
“Did anyone ever tell you that you look like Carrie Prejean?”
“Yeah; I get that a lot.”
She’s not – I checked.
“Okay, now let’s get you into the most gratuitously vulnerable position we can ...“
“Come on, honey, let’s go – I’m on three death panels today.”
Kelly’s starting to have second thoughts about letting the bureaucrats in Washington make her health care decisions
What if Kathleen Sebelius forces her to use birth control or become a lesbian?
I can’t be the only one getting turned on by this …
Wait – what the hell is that?
Oh … that’s pretty neat. They should have those in shoe stores.
Due to rationing, they’ll only be able to examine one of her breasts – and a congressional subcommittee decides which one
“Now wait here while I FedEx your Pap smear to the IRS.”
I’m pretty sure this also has something to do with Benghazi.
18th century rendering of human brain on wall will come in handy if someone needs an emergency lobotomy
Kelly and her perfect hair sense that something strange is going on
Is that …“Yankee Doodle Dandy” ?
I have to admit, I did not see this coming.
So, she just gave birth to Uncle Sam?
If that wasn’t creepy enough for you, here it is again in close-up
The most disturbing part is that it’s Bill Clinton behind the mask
“Come on, baby – let me into the Oval Office.”
“I want to show you my stimulus package.”
I could go on … but that would be in poor taste.
… except when it comes to determining under what circumstances you’re required to gestate a fetus in your womb
That’s actually not possible, or even a thing – but, for God’s sake, do it, before it’s too late!
Hold on – Generation Opportunity needs to make sure this is horrible enough to go viral …
She’ll never be able to watch the 4th of July parade again
Because a concerted effort to give everyone in America the ability to afford medical treatment is the worst thing that has ever happened