Synopsis: A middle-aged small business owner receives written warning of an impending, near-fatal heart attack, then restores his immortality by taking low dose aspirin.
Bob begins Friday morning meeting with cheerful small talk before telling staff he’s sold company for five million bucks and they’re all being fired
It’s always hard to let good people go, but he’ll have two weeks at Sandals to try to get over it
Suddenly the administrative assistant who disregarded Bob’s prior suggestion to “dress a little sexier” enters with an urgent message
“Thanks, Mary – and really great spin you put on the meaning of ‘no interruptions.’”
Can’t believe I thought about doing that airhead.
This must be about my tee time …
Uh-oh … it’s from a vengeful God
Bob hopes it doesn’t happen while he’s in the john – that would be embarrassing
On the bright side, it doesn’t say anything about Ebola
“Dramatization” disclaimer reminds viewers that this is not actually a man learning of a future cardiac event via Post-it Note
Bob wonders if he can reschedule near-death experience to coincide with sister-in-law’s visit next month
Hmmm … it’s not notarized …
I should get my lawyer to look at this – maybe there’s some kind of a loophole.
To prove He’s not messing around, God gives Bob a startling preview of the afterlife
Utter, infinite nothingness negates existence of Shia LaBeouf, so it’s not all bad
After surviving heart attack, Bob put on ten extra pounds and started wearing hospital gown around house
In next room, Julia unenthusiastically practices using defibrillator while daydreaming about next husband
The official aspirin of the Third Reich, now in an easy-open bottle
FYI – your next paper cut will take three days to stop bleeding.
Bob almost feels good enough to start cheating on his wife again
If these interfere with his low dose Cialis, he’ll have a very difficult decision to make
Just in case someone’s filming, Bob makes sure to carefully grasp all his medications so that his fingers don’t cover the label
WARNING: If you take the whole bottle at once, it’s no longer considered a “low dose.”
The brand recommended by 4 out of 5 Korean airline stewardesses