Saturday, September 12, 2015

Christie “Protect America”

Chris Christie Commercial Chris Christie Logo

Straight-talking governor / purported presidential candidate Chris Christie shows off the extensive foreign policy expertise he acquired between meals in Trenton, New Jersey by presenting a series of stock photos and video snippets intended to convince Republican primary voters that they live in a dangerous world which would magically become safer if an undisciplined bully occupied the White House.

Chris Christie Commercial Say No To Iran


Chris Christie Commercial Berating


Chris Christie Commercial Camera


Chris Christie Commercial Khomeini Khamenei


Chris Christie Commercial Iranian Mobs


Chris Christie Commercial Confederate Flag


Chris Christie Commercial John Kerry


Chris Christie Commercial Tehran


Chris Christie Commercial Send A Message


Chris Christie Commercial Fort Lee


Chris Christie Commercial Obama


Chris Christie Commercial Iran Deal


Chris Christie Commercial Soft White


Chris Christie Commercial Negotiating Table


Chris Christie Commercial Reagan


Chris Christie Commercial Gorbachev


Chris Christie Commercial Attack


Chris Christie Commercial ISIS


Chris Christie Commercial Threat


Chris Christie Commercial Tracking Terrorists


Chris Christie Commercial Trump

Loathsomeness: 8.5

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  1. Note how much his nose grows from frame 0:01 to 0:02 as he denies involvement in TrafficGate scandal.

    The increased cost of State Dinners alone could double the deficit if he is elected.

    1. Is gastric bypass surgery covered under Obamacare?

  2. At least he's not proposing naming everything after people from Ohio.

    1. But how will Alaskans feel about "Mt. Springsteen"?

  3. TWO rude, egocentric bigmouths in the GOP field? I think you're low-balling it by a lot, Editor :)

    Fantastic job as usual, though.

  4. You could add at :20 the picture of Reagan trying to come up with more sneaky ways to sell weapons to Iran's Ayatollah Khomeini to fund the Contras, causing hundreds of thousands of Central Americans to flee north.

    1. There is no way Christie knows the difference between Sandinista and sangria.

    2. Yeah, except he knows that one has fruit in it.

    3. Looks like it's time for some traffic problems in Managua.

  5. Governor, before running for president, try walking on a treadmill.

    1. He did try. The treadmill is now buried under the end zone in Giants Stadium.

  6. Oh, the Tale of the Whale. He screams "get the hell off the beach" a full day before Sandy hits and tries to attack a resident who walked up to him on the Seaside Heights boardwalk and said "stop picking on teachers" with a Kohr Brothers vanilla custard cone. Speaking of the boardwalk, the state paid to rebuild that boardwalk twice and somehow no one checked the electrical wiring under it after Sandy, so rather than housing people whose houses were destroyed after Sandy, he rebuilt the boardwalk a second time, because it provides jobs and is a national icon (???). I'm a mayor of a NJ town that lost a privately-owned boardwalk and tossed responsibility for dealing with a Democratic supermajority to a state Senator, who was wonderful. The week after Memorial Day, he showed up and said, "I made this boardwalk happen -- I'm the guy who gets things done!" He had zip zero to do with it; my township lent the money for the boardwalk to the owners. I will laugh my ass off when he gets hauled off to jail over Bridgegate. That scandal is only the tip of the iceberg.


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